This is known as a Patham day, that is, the releasing
of a girl from her house, and the local blacksmith claims
a gift, which takes the form of money or a blanket.
The bridesmaids are then allowed to go, but the groomsmen,
who have by now become their firm friends,
take them into their charge and feast them for some
days, and, before saying good-bye, they combine in
erecting as a sign of the marriage a “ Chandan,” that
is, they place two long poles (Darchos) in the ground
and fasten a rope between them, and on to the rope they
tie all sorts of things, such as caps, books, mirrors,
streamers of different colours of cloth, scissors, &c.,
and no one would dream of removing any of them.
Subsequently it is a point of honour for the bridesmaids
to invite back the groomsmen, a few at a time,
and return their hospitality in their own village.
Keeping up the semblance of a forcible removal,
envoys are sent to the father of the girl to persuade him
to accept what cannot be mended. This he readily
does, and the final stage is reached when the bridegroom
pays the bride’s “ mother’s milk money,” viz.,
nine shillings and four pence, and also a little money
to the father.
j I t sometimes happens that a girl is carried away in
reality by force from the Rambang, but unless, and
until, she eats “ dalang,” “ datu,” and drinks liquor
with her captor she is not considered to be married to
him. If she is conniving at the elopement against the
will of her parents, and formally eats and drinks the
ceremonial food, in process of time her relations are
compelled to accept the inevitable. There have been
instances when three parties of boys have been determined
to carry off the same girl and have blocked all
the tracks, the girl being finally taken off across an
almost impossible mountain slope, but such cases are
not the common practice of the people, just as in
England runaway matches are not unknown, but Heaven
forfend that they should be considered the rule! Widow
marriage, in the sense of a marriage with all the honour
and dignity of a first marriage, is unknown. However,
it is a common practice for widows to go and live
with other men, but the unions thus created never
occupy the same rank in popular estimation as an
H
OUR ROAD ALONG THE KALI RIVER